Not a Commodity

Edible food should NEVER be thrown in a landfill. Few things grind my gears (as Peter Griffin would say) as much as discarded food, especially the waste seen on an institutional or corporate level. With the edible, healthy food thrown away every single day in the industrialized world, no human on the earth should ever have to starve to death or be malnourished. Shortage is not the problem, but distribution and re-distribution. All this waste, in the name of greed, and worship of the idol of money.

www.sisterscamelot.org

http://members.cox.net/foodnet/index.htm

and one in every community?????

Purpose

Our purpose here is to work miracles.

Everything else is temporary relief for minor existential pain.

-Marianne Williamson

Blazing Blue Phoenix Day

As I was walking here to Jody's house, with the sky going up forever into bright blue and the sun shining so near that it's screaming that spring and summer are so, so close, with mountains of snow along the streets blazing white in the shining, and snow on the pavement vaporizing into a dry-ice fog because it's decided to join the sun rather than endure the bitter cold...

I came to know that I can't just pray and talk to God when things seem difficult and I am in pain. I have to do it every day, all the time, and always give my thanks. And not just use the times of hurt to open my heart and get closer to God (when there is no other choice), but to do that every moment.

I'm reading the Course in Miracles, and I'll tell you, it's exactly what I needed to do. Jody happened to have the books, and I am so thankful. I've been waiting for them to come to me since I went to the discussion group in NOLA in Oct./Nov./Dec. The learning I've had in the past week is the biggest gift. We're moving toward the sun; it's getting a little more awesome all the time and misperceptions are falling away. The perfection is there waiting, if you're ready to claim it.

I finally made it over to visit Steve & Jody last Tuesday (2/27/07), and it was great to catch up. I've been back here for 2 months now. Some things happen slowly, but the season comes eventually. Thank God life is starting to stir again, and things are quickening. I stopped over again last night (Sunday, 3/4/07), and they were so kind and gave me a dinner of salad with Annie's raspberry dressing and brussels sprouts. They had salmon patties which smelled so good and I was so tempted to at least try one, but I did not. It's been since summer 2005 when I ate fish, so I really hesitate to break that. These cravings for McDonald's fish sandwiches lately have been pretty bizarre. Several times I almost did it. I sure used to love those. The flavor was a little piece of heaven. I think the only reason I've been thinking so much about trying fish again is because I'm going to do the big detox real soon, the first big and serious one I will ever have done, because I know I need it now, especially after all the environmental influences and trials of the last 2 years. After the detox I will strive for great purity and constant cleansing, so it feels like I should do something crazy now and get it out of my system. If it's going to be meat, it's going to be fish, and if it's going to be fish, it's can only be a Filet-O-Fish, the most novel breaded fish square with cheese and pepper in the world!! I guess it's the urge to fulfill the Mardi Gras/Lenten ritual. My mouth is watering as I speak. Maybe a couple Chicken McNuggets with the fabulous BBQ sauce wouldn't hurt either; there's probably not much actual chicken in there anyway. Maybe I should be strong and fight these obviously sinful urges...or maybe being in New Orleans so long got the best of me. It feels like my duty to have my own personal Mardi Gras and Lent.

So last night I finally made the changes on my father's website like he's wanted me to do since I got back to Ashland, and now today I'm working on my digital picture project. So, so many. Lots of organizing and archiving to do. And get prints made of a whole bunch of them since I'm here in Ashland and Northern Photographics are who I can trust. If it weren't for Dale Thomas and his photography, I would never have discovered Ashland, WI. I just gotta do a lot of work on this computer in general, to get my files organized, since I'm probably going to send it back to Kansas this spring for my father to use to replace our 1999 Compaq. So I'm very thankful Jody called at 11:00 to get me up and see if I wanted to come over. This is a BIG beautiful day!!! I didn't get 8 hours of sleep, but I'm glad I'm awake and enjoying this right now. Last night was beautiful, when Bob took a break from the schoolwork and visited me and the talk we had. We're both getting on track, one day at a time. I can smell spring in the wind.

The Puppet Church, shining right across the street as I'm sitting here.

Time is of the Essence

Time is of the essence, as my dearest friend Willie told me. No more waiting. That's right.

Today I'm in Shalimar, Florida, and it is peaceful heaven. It is next to Fort Walton Beach, and Destin, and an hour east of Pensacola. I've been staying with this wonderful kind lady Kathy and her three kids Chris, Raymond, and Sebastian. And the beach is right across the street. There's not too much to worry about around here. Just go from the house to the beach, the beach to the house, and repeat indefinitely. From the little beach is a beautiful view. We're on the north shore of Choctawatchee Bay, and you look across the big water and see Fort Walton to the southwest, and Destin to the southeast. And between the two on the horizon is a tiny strip of land with a highway, amid big sand dune mountains, and that is a stretch of Santa Rosa Island. On the other side of the island strip is the Gulf of Mexico. To go around the bay and thru Fort Walton to reach the Gulf is only 5 miles. Sort of a long walk, as Bob and I found out; but we were carrying heavy bags of groceries from Publix so that made it harder. But it's a nice bike ride, for sure. I guess they have real smooth sidewalks because a lot of old people live here. They also have lots of bingo halls.

Sitting on the beach across the street is kind of like sitting on Joni's Beach on Madeline Island. The Fort Walton lights are like Bayfield, and the Destin lights are like Ashland. And there's a huge condo building (that stands apart from all the rest of the condos) in Destin, and that kind of represents the power plant in Ashland, or maybe the Ore Dock, which you can just make out as a larger feature on the distant Ashland shoreline.

So it's kind of like Joni's Beach. Except, of course, this is the Florida panhandle and not northern Wisconsin. It was beautiful warm today, and I sat on the sand in the sun while I talked to Georgia and Willie on the phone, until the sun went down, because then it was a little too chilly. I was going to get on the bus back to New Orleans yesterday, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I've been here 2 weeks now, this time around, and it's such a comfortable home that's helped me so much that I wish I didn't have to leave soon.

What's so good about it?

1. The peace. It's just us. No drama. No swirling vortices of chaotic energy. No responsibilities or attachments or history. Just the house and the beach. A simple pattern. Sleeping, eating, writing, reading, Internet, talking to Kathy, talking on the phone, watching the waves and the sunset. It's all the break that I needed.
2. The clean. Clean air, clean water, clean silence, clean relationships. The toxins were really building up in my system through all that time in New Orleans, and they were beginning to manifest in sickness and pain. Some physical, some energetic. After coming here, most of them got the chance to come out, and it feels so good to almost be back to normal and healthy again. 6 months in New Orleans was beyond my limit. I look forward to the deeper detox I'll have when I go back to Kansas for Christmas, and then back to Ashland for long-term.
3. The sacred time that I had here with Bob. After the SOA, we spent Thanksgiving week here, and it was for sure one of the best weeks of my life. It feels like my whole life has been leading up to what Bob and I have now. Of course that's true of the connection between any past and any present. But the magnitude of this present, that week we spent together, definitely stood out as one of those shining milestones, a magical time when tons of spirals have come back around on a higher plane, and you see all the connections, all the BLINDING PERFECTION. The times when you see the manifestation, the results, of years of work or pain or joy or learning. A path you've been traveling a long time, and finally you see where it was going all along. You remember all those strange cryptic billboards you read along the way, and now they make Perfect Sense. It's times like that, the Thanksgiving week we spent here, that I cry and laugh again and again, struck with the insane beauty of our lives, and God's supreme sense of humor and absolute love for us.

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I'm still here, in the Center of the Universe

written 6:28 p.m. Sunday, September 24th, 2006

Yes, I know, I've been bad and haven't posted on here since I made the journey back to New Orleans on June 16th. You shouldn't be surprised; we all know how I operate. But hey, I'm doing it right now, and there's infinite hope for the future!

I guess it's been hard to begin writing because SO MUCH has happened! The motion here in my life right now is really otherworldly. I want to get it all down and share it, but then the days and weeks fly by and it seems hopeless to dream of catching up. That's why I'm trying to get better at letting the past go and doing just what I can do right now. Starting where I am, rather than trying to start from any other point. A little bit is better than nothing. And if I'm never going to sit down and make the masterpiece any time soon, in the meantime I better put aside my high expectations and pride and just produce something!

So it's another beautiful day in New Orleans. I'm at CC's coffee shop in the Quarter, with an endless round of tourists in horse-drawn carriages going by, and a plan just flew over pulling a big banner that said "Hand Grenades @ Tropical Isle." I know what that refers to, thanks to the girls from Baton Rouge/Mississippi and their bar-hopping "bachelorette party." Not my thing at all of course, but it was interesting to observe the vast culture of people who drink alcohol and think that it's fun and feels good.

Anyway, this place is closing soon so I'll be getting on my way back home. Things just keep getting better and better. Being in the Center of the Universe is a blessing I never could have dreamed up myself!

Welcome to Flickr...

Wildwood sunset
Originally uploaded by MichaelaMatthea.

This picture is from July 2003, sunset from the boardwalk at Wildwood, New Jersey. Just putting it up because I love it and I'm testing out Flickr.

I decided I needed an online photo storage site since I won't be bringing my computer with me to New Orleans (or on my other travels, unless I get a laptop one day, which is probably inevitable). After researching this evening, I really couldn't find anything else that sounded as good as the popular "Flickr," so I gave into the trend and signed up. It's pretty good, but I don't like the fact that you can only upload 20 MB per month, and then you can only view your 200 most recent photos (with the free account). You can eliminate these restrictions if you pay them $25 a year. Since I'm not paying for that for now, though, I hurried and uploaded most of my 20 MB allotment before May 31 turned into June 1.

Anyone know of other good photo storage that costs less?